According to the Guinness Book of Records, the Guinness Book of Records holds the record for holding records.
A small church in southeast Texas has petitioned the local board of education to ban girls in public schools from exposing their ear lobes which it considers indecent exposure.
Half a loaf is better than no rest at all.
Simple recipe for beef tartar: remove fillet from freezer; thaw.
Despite their strong exoskeletons, grasshoppers do not make good bookmarks.
A polite cannibal never talks with his mouth full.
The majority of those who wrap their ears in aluminum foil are right handed.
Birds cannot move their eyes, so must move their heads to look in another direction, such as the very- near-term future.
It is virtually impossible to swallow a tennis ball unless you first peel it.
Stepping on your elbow with your foot can be painful.
Even with condiments, sand and gravel, though appealing to those trying to relieve that “empty feeling”, should not be part of a regular diet.
Tattooing eyes on your eye lids makes you appear awake even while napping in public.
Spanish onions don’t understand a single word of English.
An amateur ornithologist in Louisiana became excited when he thought he had discovered a one-legged stork, until the startled bird woke up and flew away.
The record for pole vaulting the Grand Canyon is one-third.
The only mention of the iPhone in the Bible is in the Revised Edition.
Though there were many instances where it would have been useful, masking tape was never used during the Civil War.
You cannot lift an adult rhinoceros more than six inches off the ground using only dental floss.
On a dare, a man at the Clare County Fair snorted 38 lima beans up his right nostril, and although medics retrieved all but two, they took root in his duodenum.
When robots kiss, the use of tongues is legally forbidden in many states.
The Art Nouveaux attempt to make household pets of electric ells failed.